I have things to share with you about my adventures in Germany, Austria, England, and New York this summer - delightful, touristy things.
This, however, is not that post.
Travel is difficult for me.
Read MoreI have things to share with you about my adventures in Germany, Austria, England, and New York this summer - delightful, touristy things.
This, however, is not that post.
Travel is difficult for me.
Read MoreRecently two different people said to me (in response to my social media postings), You really enjoy your life, don't you?
It's a lovely thing to say, but in both cases I noticed a strange internal reaction.
Read MoreTracy and I have known one another since high school, but we went on our first date on his birthday 16 years ago. This year, we decided to celebrate his 50th and our anniversary with a week in Los Angeles, the city to which we both are drawn.
Read MoreSurrender, in the spiritual sense, can be a difficult concept.
I've often heard someone say they're surrendered to God and what follows is something horrible.
The god they're surrendering to doesn't resemble the God I know. The god speaking to them is a god of the ego or psychosis.
Read MoreThe fact that art heals is still an unknown fact for the majority of people.
When I was an undergrad art student, art as healing was an idea that sparked great debate.
Art was art. It was serious business.
But healing?
Read MoreYears ago I had a psychic reading that struck me with its veracity.
"I see you walking along the path of your life," the reader said, "and there are people who join you. They come and walk with you for a while then they leave."
Read MoreI hadn't planned on bringing my laptop on this trip, but I did.
So here I am, sitting on a white sofa in a lovely apartment in Jericho, next to the door that opens onto a large wooden patio. The air is cool and the sky a bit cloudy.
I've already discovered a new love here - the Oxford Oratory Catholic Church of St Aloysius Gonzaga. I've visited twice in as many days.
Read MoreWhen I was a young woman, walking down the street deep in thought, a man I did not know would say to me, "Smile, it can't be that bad...Why would a pretty girl like you look so unhappy?"
It happened quite a bit.
If you are a woman, I'm willing to bet it has happened to you - a stranger has told you to smile.
Read MoreI am an incredible homebody.
Being away for three weeks is difficult for me. Three weeks sounds like a short time, but to me, it feels like a long time. Even though I love traveling and seeing and experiencing – even though I love being in England – I miss being at home.
I don’t like being away from Tracy or my pug boys.
I crave a hot salt bath and a night in my own bed.
It’s Saturday and I’m writing this from a very different sort of bed in Oxford, listening to the wind in the trees and watching the rain fall. Tomorrow, I’ll go to Mass one last time at St. Mary Magdalen and eat a heavy lunch and yes, probably more sugar, and on Monday morning, begin the journey back.
I’m grateful for this trip but ready to be home.
I’ve seen some parts of England I’d never seen before – like the National Gallery, and London’s Hampstead where I walked across the Heath and had spaghetti at the Coffee Cup, and Hereford, where the Cathedral’s stained glass sang to me.
But this trip was bookended by the two most important experiences – theology school at the beginning and the full moon in Glastonbury with Jackie followed by a trip to C. S. Lewis’ grave and home at the end.
I can’t adequately describe how good it was to be with Jackie. I have such love and respect for her and to see her walking through a car park toward me is just the best feeling ever.
I can think of no better way to spend a significant full moon than in Avalon with Jackie.
We started our day at the Abbey.
Glastonbury Abbey is connected with legend to a degree that is unparalleled by any other abbey in England. Since Medieval times it has held legendary status as the earliest Christian foundation in Britain linked to Joseph of Arimathea and the burial place of King Arthur.
We had tea and visited shops and climbed the Tor in the evening.
We stayed in an Air B&B with a kind and interesting host then visited the Chalice Well the next morning.
The Chalice Well is among the best known and most loved holy wells in Britain. Many legends are attributed to its chalybeate waters, which flow ceaselessly at a steady rate and temperature that never varies. Not least among these is that they represent the blood of Christ miraculously springing forth from the ground when Joseph of Arimathea buried or washed the cup used at the Last Supper. For others the waters are acknowledged as the essence of life, the gift from Mother Earth to sustain its living forms and so a continuous spring-like Chalice Well is a direct expression of an unbounded life force.
That afternoon, after Jackie had headed home and I was back in Oxford, Jenny and Mary took my mother and me to the church where C.S. Lewis is buried.
There was something so beautiful and perfect about the offerings of pinecones left on his grave marker. It touched me deeply. We went on to see his house and walked in the nature preserve that was once his property.
It is a magical place.
These past three weeks, but particularly the first days and these last days, represent a profound healing shift for me. I’m not ready or can’t yet speak about it specifically, but it happened and I’m processing it and I’m feeling fortified for the journey forward.
“It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.”
— C.S. Lewis
I’m feeling a lot less pessimistic about myself – about this vessel, my body, about life and the next half of it.
This morning as I made my coffee, I noticed the way my feet felt against the floor. I noticed how it is that my feet fit against the ground.
In yoga class, our instructor is in the middle of the room and we arrange our mats all around her, to face her.
There is no back row, no hiding.
I am next to the mirror.
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